Below is a collection of advice I would give my younger self. I know my younger self, and she wouldn’t have listened to one word of it. It’s really easy to feel regret over the bad decisions we made when we were previous versions of ourselves. While I was writing this I came to realize that there was so much I didn’t know or understand in the midst of making poor choices. I guess you could say it was therapeutic in a way, and writing this post allowed me to give my younger self some grace.
Advice for Thirteen-Year-Old Me
- You’re beautiful, not in spite of, but because of your freckles, brown eyes and never-ending awkwardness. One day someone is going to help you believe it.
- You gain nothing from comparing yourself to other people. The things you consider valuable now won’t matter much in twenty years.
- There is absolutely nothing cool about smoking cigarettes. That cucumber melon body spray isn’t fooling anyone.
- Be kind to yourself. You’re doing fine.
- The older you get, the less you’ll realize that you know.
- Step away from the tweezers. Seriously, one day you’ll miss those bushy eyebrows.
- You’re going to regret drinking that cheap bottle of wine in about thirty minutes.
- Your self-worth does not depend on your ability to change someone else.
- Don’t live for the future. It’s going to get busier and in some ways more difficult.
- There are other ways, better ways to cope than alcohol.
- One day it will all make sense, or it won’t. Either way, you’re going to be okay.
- Don’t make people who come into your life pay for someone else’s mistakes.
- Stop running from yourself and those who love you.
- Some people don’t deserve your trust or your benefit of the doubt. Listen to your instincts
- Start reading self-help books.
- Grieve and let your children see it. Fall apart for a little while. No matter you ever came to believe, crying is not weakness.
- When therapy doesn’t work, don’t quit therapy. Quit the therapist.
- Not everyone or everything deserves a place in your life. Carefully evaluate how you spend your time and who you spend it with.
- You’re going to become stronger through facing challenges that you will never see coming. But when this storm passes, you’re going to feel like a fucking warrior.
- Forgiveness is not weakness. It’s freedom.
What advice would you give your younger self? If you’ve never put much thought into it, I encourage you to give it a shot. As I said above, I found it to be therapeutic. You could use a journal to keep track of your thoughts. For more journal prompts click here.
Let’s make this a conversation by leaving your thoughts below.